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That moment of anger when you rage uncontrollably

A moment of anger and my life changed forever. Shocked eyes gazed at me as I realized the scale of my actions. Nothing could take away my fist punching explosion that made twelve placid ladies jump from their seats. My reaction to a statement that contradicted my self-knowledge appeared disturbingly extreme.

That moment of anger changed my life

The door closed on my tranquil life, and I would never return to live there again. That moment of anger had risen from the depths of my childhood. All the sad memories wrapped up in one deadly time bomb. It stripped me of my vocation and flung me into the world again. I may have had my limbs intact, unlike Michael the main character in All of You, but my heart felt crushed beyond repair. Now what?

Michael’s life changed, and he knew more than one moment of anger as he strived to rebuild his life. Michael is a hero. Unfortunately, I am not! But he too asked the question “now what?”

All of you FB banner copy

Click here to purchase your copy.

About the Book

Book title: All of You All of You by Sarah Monzon

Author: Sarah Monzon

Release date: May 15, 2017

Genre:Dual-timeline/Contemporary Romance


Maryland, Present Day

Jacquelyn Rogers can rebuild anything…except the shambles of her past. A restorer of vintage planes, she’s worked hard to earn the reputation of being one of the guys. The last thing she needs is a former Navy pilot fighting his own inner demons stepping in to defend her from dangers she thought she’d outrun long ago. Some battles must be fought alone.

After a freak accident severs Lieutenant Michael “Finch” Carrington’s dreams, as well as two limbs, he’s left with nothing but a fragile faith and a duty-bound promise to watch out for his friend’s baby sister. A promise she insists is as unnecessary as it is unappreciated. But when she turns the tables and begins to weld together the broken parts of his life, it may be his heart that is in need of protection.

England, 1944

With the world at war yet again, Alice Galloway rejects her father’s traditional expectations and offers her piloting expertise to the Air Transport Auxiliary. She may be a woman in a man’s world, but when she overhears key intelligence, she must find the strength to transcend boundaries and her own fears. Or countless people may die.

Sometimes the past reaches forward to bring hope to the future.

My Penny’s worth That moment of anger when you rage uncontrollably
1944 or modern day

All of you is an interesting story about two eras. I was surprised that I related more with the modern day saga than to the WW2  drama. Maybe it was the strong central character Michael who captivated me with his vulnerability. That macho Navy Pilot who had it all then dramatically lost everything in a freak accident. How I felt for him!

What I liked

Jack, a woman after my own heart, a girl from a male dominated family – I could identify with her and the struggles she had with overprotective brothers. Michael and Jack at times need their heads knocked together, even if self-sacrifice appears the better choice. I loved the sweet touches that at times had the pair believing they had a future together then moments later the barriers crash down. Michael’s courage and faith shine through but there is a moment of anger when he lets rip, only one you say, I am sure there were others!

What I felt it lacked.

Some of the story for me, unfortunately, left little surprise and I could figure out what would happen, especially in the 1944 tale. There were niggles in this storyline which at times distracted the enjoyment – but that is just me.

Oh that word “Bloke”, I dislike this used by a gentlewoman of the period. “Chap” would have been more in keeping with her background and class. Some others I won’t mention. Otherwise, they will ruin the plot apart from saying the book tended to be too neat in its solutions to various situations. Having said that I did enjoy the way Sarah Monzon’s chapters ended leaving me wanting to turn the next page!

What the book provides

This book gives an insight into a sudden traumatic event that tears the life out of a high flyer. The reader is subjected to the emotions of a fallen hero who no longer knows his worth. Michael’s protective nature is compromised due to his disability – can he be the man he once was? You will have to read All of You to find out!

There is also the bravery of a woman who wants to “do her bit” in the war. The information on the ATA (Air Transport Auxilary) was interesting and will no doubt be new to some readers. It made a change having women winning the war instead of the men!

The book also shares the message of trusting in God no matter what the life circumstances.

Don’t forget to put it on your holiday read list.

Thank you, Sarah Monzon, for writing this book.

*I received this book for free. No compensation was received, and all opinions are my own.*

About the Author

Sarah Monzon is a Navy chaplain’s wife and a stay at home mom to thebio photo(1) two cutest littles in the world. Playing pretend all day with them isn’t enough, she spends the evenings after their heads hit the pillow to create her own imaginary characters. When she isn’t in the world of make believe, she can be found in the pine forests of western Washington taking care of her family, fostering friendships, and enjoying all the adventures each day brings.

Her debut novel, The Isaac Project, skyrocketed to Amazon bestseller status while her Sophomore book, Finders Keepers, won the 2017 Selah award for contemporary romance.

Guest Post from Sarah Monzon

I’m so excited to be here today and getting this opportunity to hang out with y’all in this virtual world. If you are anything like me, you devour books faster than my son drinks orange juice (and he really loves orange juice!). Because of that, it is sometimes hard to come across a book with a unique premise or a message that you haven’t seen incorporated a thousand times before. As a writer, I always try to bring something fresh to the table.

In the first book of the Carrington Family Series, Finders Keepers, neither of my characters were Christians. What? No Christians in a Christian fiction novel? Most Christian fiction books usually have at least one or both main characters a Christians. Don’t worry, they both found their way to Jesus. With All of You, however, I wanted to take yet an even different approach.

I’ve ready lots of books where the main character is angry or upset with God for such-and-such thing that happened in his/her life (I’ve even written a character like that), but I hadn’t really read a story about a character that, no matter what life threw at him/her, he/she was going to trust in God no matter what. As a life-long Christian, this is a message I can identify with. The “If not, He is still good” resonation that is sometimes harder to hold on to in the midst of pain and struggles.

So, as with all my books, I hope the freshness of the story and the realness of my characters will inspire and uplift you as you travel along with them on their journey.

God Bless.

Blog Stops

September 12: A Baker’s Perspective

September 12: Quiet Quilter

September 13: Books, Books, and More Books

September 13: Jeanette’s Thoughts

September 14: Cordially Barbara

September 14: Smiling Book Reviews

September 15: Avid Reader Book Reviews

September 15: Carpe Diem

September 16: Inklings and notions

September 16: Christian Bookaholic

September 17: Christian Chick’s Thoughts

September 17: Artistic Nobody

September 18: Bookworm Mama

September 18: Remembrancy

September 19: Back Porch Reads

September 19: Kat’s Corner Books

September 20: Just Jo’Anne

September 20: Margaret Kazmierczak

September 21: The Power of Words

September 21: Mary Hake

September 22: 100 Pages per Hour

September 22: Debbie’s Dusty Deliberations

September 23: Zerina Blossom’s Books

September 23: Simple Harvest Reads (spotlight)

September 24: Blossoms and Blessings

September 24: Moments Dipped in Ink

September 25: Kathleen Denly

September 25: His Grace is Sufficient



To celebrate her tour, Sarah is giving away a $25 Amazon Gift Card!! Click below to enter. Be sure to comment on this post before you enter to claim 9 extra entries!

Chief of Sinners by Caryl McAdoo impressive to the end

I am the Chief of Sinners, walking my path, doing my own thing. Hence, when trouble hits who do I blame? Taking responsibility is an adult decision – my child’s voice wants to blame others or ignore that I had any part in the sin.

Cheif of Sinners facebook banner 2

My Penny’s worth

Chief of Sinners

Chief of Sinners is an excellent book in dealing with sin and consequences. The wonderfully portrayed character of Buddy Nightingale, a Christian man dogged with lust and remorse, whose intentions are good but his actions questionable makes me wonder if he can be saved? – Yes, he did disappoint me. Furthermore, how can a sinner sing the praises of God and still make such a mess of his life – sound familiar?


Caryl McAdoo writes gritty novels with real life drama, and this is no exception. A relationship with three never works in reality; someone will always get hurt. And this story keeps the reader guessing. Buddy walks with the devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other – who will he listen to?

A book that hooks

The book Chief of Sinners had me hooked from the start. My allegiances kept changing, how I desired the characters to sort themselves out and live happily ever after. However, that is not how the world works, nor how God plans the finale.

Support characters

However, there is not just one main character and in mho, each person plays an important role in this story – from the father who is strict and unwavering to the soldier who seeks revenge. Each provided a rich chemistry and as I read the last word I wanted more. These characters had become real, friends whom I cared about and a part of my life.

Would I recommend this book?

The book is one I would recommend, as it requires you to think and perhaps reassess your view of God’s incredible ability to love and forgive. We all sin and the verse from Matthew 18:22 when Jesus answers the question, “How many times must I forgive” he replies: “I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.” – thus indicating the extent God will take to forgive us. 

*I received this book for free. No compensation was received, and all opinions are my own.*

Coming soon 22nd September – My interview with Caryl 

About the Book

Book title: Chief of Sinners Book review for Chief of Sinners by Caryl McAdoo

Author: Caryl McAdoo

Release date: September 6, 2017

Genre: Historical Fiction

Obedience can overcome ruinous choices, and with repentance of wicked ways, God’s faithful forgiveness and mercies never fail.

Set in the afterglow of the Azusa Street Revival, this epic addition to the Texas Romance family saga sweeps through three decades of triumphs and tragedies—from the Texas Hill Country to the beaches of Normandy and beyond.

The faithful flock to his father’s tent where Buddy Nightingale leads praise and worship, but like King David, the young psalmist battles a generational curse, lust. On his first night back in Marble Falls, Texas—the place he heard the angels sang fifteen years prior—he beholds Sandra Harris, an eighteen-year-old beauty, attending strictly for the entertainment of the Spirit-filled meetings. Love strikes both, but her Church of Christ father wants no part of any holy roller.

Sometimes choices we make take us places we never intend to go, but God . . .

Click here to purchase your copy.

About the Author

Caryl McAdoo prays her story brings God glory, and a quick scroll throughEYES her novels’ rankings by Christian readers attests to the Father’s faithfulness. She loves writing almost as much as singing the new songs He gives her—look her up on YouTube to hear a few. Her high school sweetheart husband won her heart fifty-one years ago, now they share four children and seventeen grandsugars. Ron and Caryl live in the woods south of Clarksville, seat of Red River County in far Northeast Texas, waiting expectantly for God to open the next door.

Guest Post from Caryl McAdoo

Trial 3Here’s the funnest part of this launch—book ten, the last story of my Texas Romance Family Saga that covers five generations of three families over more than a century—CHIEF OF SINNERS was the “first” one written over twenty-five years ago!

When we wrote CHIEF—yes, “we”; my husband Ron (of 49 years!) and I write everything together, have since the beginning. Neither of us would ever have made it on our own, but together, we had ten books published by five houses, including Howard Books before we went Indie. Why isn’t his name on the covers?

Nov 2015Our Benjamen Cash McAdoo (the fourteen-year-old grandson we reared who came home to our house from being born) asked the same thing and didn’t much like it. One night I was writing at the computer and turned and asked Ron a question about the story. Ben spoke up. “Don’t help her, O’Pa! Your name’s not on the book!”

The answer though is that our New York agent AND the Simon and Schuster editor both said only one name was better and that it should preferably be female. So, we took their advice. It works great for us since he doesn’t like marketing, while that’s a favorite part for me—getting to make so many new friends, bonding with readers from all over the world.

So, back to the CHIEF; when Mary Sue Seymour (God rest her precious soul) told us to write a historical Christian romance set in the 1800s, Ron and I started talking about our heroine and where she’d come from and what her crisis would be. As the premise formed, the Lord gave us the wonderful idea to use the same last names as our characters in CHIEF OF SINNERS.

We figured as we wrote one novel to the next, we would eventually get to 1926 when CHIEF opened with hero Buddy Nightingale and his father Nathaniel pitching their revival tent in the small Texas Hill Country town of Marble Falls.

Twelve in 1926, Buddy is the fourth generation from Rosaleen ‘Sassy’ Fogelsong Nightingale Baylor, heroine of book two in the series HEARTS STOLEN. Buddy’s father is the son of Charley Nightingale—Sassy’s four-year-old who readers fall in love with in her story.

MIGHTY TO SAVE, book nine, 1921-1924, was the one where all the loose ends had to be tied to get us into the 1926 circumstances of CHIEF. Only a few dates and minor details had to be changed editing CHIEF, but things had to happen in MIGHTY to open CHIEF OF SINNERS.

My characters are not perfect people. They sin as we all do.

Some of them have disappointed readers—some also disappointed me. No doubt I did things to disappoint my mother. Every one of us face battles and bad choices we have to live with. What is important for all (us and my characters) is coming to repentance, turning back to God, then walking in obedience from that point forward.

I hate to think CHIEF is the last. I still can’t imagine leaving these families behind. The next story, SON OF PROMISE coming in January, is a story of Travis and Emma Lee Harris Buckmeyer’s life together (readers meet them in CHIEF), so there will be guest appearances by many readers will recognize.

And I—we—have started KING OF TEXAS, a new contemporary romance, with “Patrick” Henry Buckmeyer, named after his great-grandfather my readers know as Henry. So, maybe they will always be with me after all with a new story here and there.

I pray God blesses you and that you enjoy CHIEF OF SINNERS!

Blog Stops

September 5: A Baker’s Perspective

September 6: Debbie’s Dusty Deliberations

September 7: Janices book reviews

September 8: Locks, Hooks and Books

September 9: Connie’s History Classroom

September 10: cherylbbookblog

September 11: Just the Write Escape

September 12: D’S QUILTS & BOOKS

September 13: Carpe Diem

September 14: Bigreadersite

September 15: Mary Hake

September 16: Margaret Kazmierczak

September 17: Karen Sue Hadley

September 18: Jeanette’s Thoughts




To celebrate her tour, Caryl is giving away the following:

Grand Prize: ALL TEN books in the Texas Romance series!

1st Prize: Four first books in four of Caryl’s series

2nd Prize: Ebook of Chief of Sinners

3rd – 7th Prize: Print copy of A Vow Unbroken

8th prize: Ebook of Chief of Sinners!!

Click below to enter. Be sure to comment on this post before you enter to claim 9 extra entries!

Best giveaway 20 Authors – chance to win gift card

Best giveaway – Multi Christian Authors join together for an amazing prize.

What is the best giveaway you can get from Authors?  Of course, it’s when they join together to share their inspirational books, oh and an Amazon gift card too!

This giveaway is now closed – Congratulations to the winners Betsy Rady who won the Amazon gift card prize and Anne Rightler who won the books. Thank you to everyone who entered.

Readers we are doing this for you!

This great giveaway is valid from 11 Sept – 17 Sept 2017.

Best giveaway 20 Authors books and chance to win an amazon gift card

Who’s who

So who’s in the best giveaway line up since sliced bread?

A place to call home by Merrillee Whren
How to Make Victoria Sponge by Margaret Kazmierczak
My Heart Belongs in Castle Gate, Utah by Angie Dicken
Murder for the Time Being by Joanie Bruce 
With Music in my Heart by Author Carole Brown
Buried Secrets by Rachel J. Good
Finding Hope in Savannah by Melissa Wardwell
Under the Heavens by Thomas Nye
Ready or Not by Chautona Havig: Just the Write Escape
Surround My by Marguerite Martin Gray
Wheresoever They May Be by Terri Wangard
Elli by Author CJ Samuels
The Bedwarmer’s Son by Caryl McAdoo
Thee Will I Cherish by Author JoAnn Durgin
A God of All Seasons by TH Meyer Art of Fear Not
She Who Knows by Barbara Bras
Straight Flies the Arrow by Sydney Tooman Betts
Pony Express Romance by Misty M. Beller, Author
My Heart Belongs in Mackinac Island by Carrie Fancett Pagels
Snow Belle by Jackie Castle – Author page
The Return by Suzanne Woods Fisher
Baggage Claim by Cathe Swanson
Beauty Resorted by Rachel Skatvold – Author
Two Suitors for Anna by Molly Jebber
The Judge’s Bride by Patricia PacJac Carroll ~ Author
An Undeniable Secret by JEB Spredemann

Never heard of the above authors

Well shame on you, maybe it’s time you did!

Link to wonderful giveaway: This giveaway has now finished.

I hope you win -if not you have a tremendous opportunity to read some new books.


Changing focus by providing support and laughter

Changing focus

Changing focus as I stood knees trembling, waiting my turn on the scales of fear, I noticed a single face staring around for a friendly acknowledgement. That lonely lady sat in the middle of the loud and exuberant banter. Not so long ago that lone stranger was me.

life style change support when you are alone, wieght loss

Finding new friendships

Shoes back on I sauntered over to speak to the new member. A broad smile greeted my first words. Instantly we connected. All it had taken was a “hello” and “were you happy with your weigh-in?” I love meeting people, but a lack of self-esteem and shyness hindered this in the past, however having a common cause is a great way to bridge the awkwardness.

“I lost a pound; I’m so delighted.”

“How fantastic I enthused, I ……” – Hehe, you’ll have to wait to hear how I got on.


Now changing focus or “Lifestyle changes are a process that take time and require support. Once you’re ready to make a change, the difficult part is committing and following through. So do your research and make a plan that will prepare you for success. Careful planning means setting small goals and taking things one step at a time.” (American Psychological Association)

Improving your life

My opening comment led to a gush of information sharing – I felt I had known my new friend for longer than the few brief moments we had just shared. There is nothing like feeling part of a new adventure that will change someone’s life. This thrill must have been how the sailors of old felt when embarking on the high seas for the first time. At least before the turbulent seas and thunderous gales sent them to their quarters heaving from sea sickness! At least this changing focus on life doesn’t involve vomit!

Life style change support when loosing weight

Lettuce talk business

So how is Lettuce doing I hear you ask? Or perhaps you don’t really care – if so I am surprised you are still reading. All hail to those that still are – God bless you!

Lettuce had a run in with Jacket Potato. She took a disliking to the amount of room he took on my plate. She decided I favoured his flavour more than hers – oh the squabbling! In the end, I ate both, and that was that!

Tom A To – how I love his petite round juicy taste. I caught him and his friend playing bowls in the fridge using Courgettes (Zucchini) as pins. Yes, the refrigerator is a veritable jungle!

life style change support loosing weight

Sugar, sugar, sugar

Now that I am well on the journey to changing focus from cakes and chocolate to healthy eating (cakes – now I am drooling, how I love them… get behind me, Homer Simpson) my taste buds are revising their opinion on sugary foods. Thank the Lord as it was getting out of control.

According to statics in the UK: “Added sugars shouldn’t make up more than 5% of the energy (calorie intake) you get from food and drink each day. This is about 30g of sugar a day for those aged 11 and over.”

Crumbs, Coke has 39g  in just one can – that is over your sugar intake for one day!

Check these out:

  • Raisins  42.5g serving – 30g
  • Yoplait Yogurt, Strawberry  6 oz Container – 27g
  • Power Bar, Chocolate Peanut Butter 1 bar (65g) 23g
  • Oreos, one serving (4 cookies/34g) – 14g
  • Pop Tarts, Frosted Cherry  2 Pastries – 34g
  • Cinnabon Cinnamon Roll  1 pastry – 55g
  • Snickers one Regular Size bar (59g) – 30g
  • Skittles one  bag (2.6 oz) – 47g
  • Apple one large apple (3.25″/223g – 10% waste) – 23g
  • Apple one cup slices (109g) – 11g )

For more  examples:

Life style change support loosing weight

Constantly learning

Wow, what an eye opener – looking at this site has reaffirmed my changing focus on food. No wonder I put on the weight. At times I would eat a large bag of skittles or a snickers bar in one day on top of all the other sugary choices I made!

Laughing your way home

On another note “researchers, discovered that laughing increased both heart rate and calorie expenditure by up to 20 per cent – and the longer participants laughed for, the greater the effects. Using the results, the scientists then went on to calculate that just 15 minutes of laughter a day will burn 10 to 40 calories, depending on a person’s weight and the intensity of the laughter. That’s enough to shift between 1 and 4lb a year.”

Life style change supporting weigh lose


Oh, by the way, I am not suggesting that you subscribe to the above website or any of the other references. I used it purely to gain some insight as to how laughing can help you to move towards a healthier life style.

Weighting for an answer?

Are you still with me or did you scoot down here just for the results? If you did, you missed some helpful facts along the way.

Laughing is my secret ingredient.

So after that 2lb increase last week, I managed to lose that again this week, so I am back on track – until the next weigh-in!

Not so long ago that lone stranger was me but joining a group that supports and enjoys one another’s company has opened up a new world. I would certainly recommend it.

Life style support for weight loss

Finally to take us away

After three, (to the tune of Money, Money, Money by Abba) Sugar, sugar, sugar, it’s a dieter’s downfall in a wholesome world. 

What would stop you from changing focus in your life?


Painful memories – Allowing God to hug your pain

Painful memories

A lovely lady friend sobbed on my shoulder, her painful memories dogging her life and causing sleepless nights. I embraced her, allowing the tears to shed freely. Who was I to judge? Abusive scars nailed her to despair.

Painful memories Allowing God to hug the tears away

“How can I help?” I asked

The need for the NSPCC

Professor Pat Thane Research Professor in Contemporary British History, King’s College London says ( “Child abuse was exposed in the late 19th c. It was the reason for the founding of the NSPCC in 1883. They demonstrated that abuse was extensive. This led to legislation rather more speedily than domestic violence, in 1889. Cruelty to cattle had been outlawed in 1822.”

How interesting that cruelty to cattle appeared more important than child abuse!

The daughter of the King

Painful memories God wants to hug you

“Talk to me about God’s love,” she said.

We sat down in her sitting room and played some praise songs quietly, just loud enough to be heard but not intrusive.

“God adores you; you are his daughter..”

“But I am soiled, battered and bruised – how can he love a wretch like me when I don’t like me?”

“God’s eyes do not see the stains of the painful memories only the pains. His heart and love for you are bigger than the universe. Nothing stops him loving you. And he wants you to learn to love yourself.”

The uncomfortable nature of abuse
Painful memories - giving God the pain

“Those painful memories prevent that. I am unclean, disgusting; I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without feeling guilty.”

“What do you feel guilty about?”

“The past, the things I allowed to happen.”

“You were not responsible; your father beat you, how could that be your fault.”

“If only I learned faster, understood what he was teaching me. I riled him – made him angry. He said so.”

It’s not your fault

“That is not your fault. Your father allowed his anger to boil over. You did not deserve to be beaten.”

Painful memories you are not to blame

“I suppose.”

“There’s no suppose; your painful memories are not based on I suppose. They were real, frightening and wrong. That little girl faced abuse from a trusted adult. Kept it hidden like a dirty secret and now it is time to call on God to hug you to show you the real love of a Father. Your tears from the past and present have been heard in heaven.”

Hope in solving social problems

“Throughout history, people have been aware of social problems- of crime, violence, abuse. Perhaps what was new in 20th c, beginning in the 19th was the belief that they really could be solved, with the help of emerging expertise in psychology and the social sciences, apparently increasing understanding of the problems and with the growth of government action, reaching into areas previously thought private and beyond its remit. These hopes may have been over-optimistic.” (Professor Pat Thane)


The power of forgiveness

Painful memories - God loves you

“How do I find peace?”

“By acknowledging who has power over your life. The painful memories or God? Through the authority of forgiveness.”


“Yes, forgiving your father, yourself and God.”

“You ask too much.”

“It is not I that asks it.”

“Then who?”

“God. It is He who will heal your mind, heart and soul.”


My friend sighed deeply and shook her head. “Then I am lost. I can’t forgive my father. He took everything away from me. My childhood, self-esteem, trust, confidence and joy. He installed fear and anger where innocence once lived. I hate what he did.”

Painful memories - God loves you

God’s promise

“This is God’s promise” – Revelation 21:4 (AKJV)

And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.

“Forgiving those that have hurt you will release you from death, sorrow, crying and pain. Is your life not a living death?”

“Yes, I have not lived it to fulfilment due to my brokenness.”

Painful memories - God loves you

“Then would you like to?”

“I suppose.”

“If you forgive, God will hug you and your pain; He will make you whole again. I know this is not an easy path for you maybe, this quote will help by Corrie Ten Boom might help.”

Corrie Ten Boom

Even as the angry, vengeful thoughts boiled through me, I saw the sin of them. Jesus Christ had died for this man; was I going to ask for more? Lord Jesus, I prayed, forgive me and help me to forgive him….Jesus, I cannot forgive him. Give me your forgiveness….And so I discovered that it is not on our forgiveness any more than on our goodness that the world’s healing hinges, but on his. When he tells us to love our enemies, he gives along with the command, the love itself.

“I will think upon this and pray that I can seek this solution.”

I left my friend at her crossroads and hoped in time she might seek God’s peace.

Painful memories - choosing the right path

Moving forwards

Painful memories of childhood or adult abuse live long in the mind – seeking help is not easy, nor throwing off the power of hopeless and helpless feelings. God treasures you, and He does want to free and hug you. He longs to be your Father, who protects and loves His children. In Him, there is healing, in Him there is hope.

In what way have you heard the call to forgive?

How to reboot your life after a traumatic event

The traumatic road

Sitting in the car edging away from my life of almost three years, I jolted back to the traumatic conversation that placed me at this moment heading home.

“You need to sort things out, and it can’t happen here, you must re-enter the world.”

Dread seeped from every pore, panic enveloped me, and disbelief filled my mind. I wanted to scream “No.” I had no choice, however, as my future was not mine to decide – tears cascaded and fear took over.

I had come to escape the world not ever wanting to be part of it again, but here I sat being driven back into it. Shock flooded my senses; my body started to shake, the traumatic conclusion of a hope filled life crushed. “How could they?”

If I could have taken a dose of memory loss instead, I think I would have grasped it with both hands.

Living with rejection and fear following me around, re-entering the world of chaos tore at my heart.  Every sinew screeched to breaking point – Father help me, I can’t do this alone.

Oh, how I understand Vikki’s pain. Together we walk the same damaged road trying to reboot our lives.

Book review for Will Not See by Chautona HavigClick here to purchase your copy.

My penny’s worth Book Review for Will Not See by Chautona Havig
What I liked

Chautona Havig is a master craftsman when it comes to writing characters. Vikki seems the last person to have a past, but in beautifully scripted form, this young lady steps out of the pages alive with doubts, fears and the handicap of losing her memory.

Trying to piece Vikki’s life together is fraught with realisations – some funny and others disturbing, especially with her friend remembering more than Vikki does about her past. I am glad that Vikki decided not to reinvent herself like Ella in “None So Blind” as I identify more with Vikki than Ella.

Which supporting character did I enjoy reading about?

Brandon – the underdog. I love his humour and knight like qualities. His service and giving. The risk taker who gently woos the girl of his dreams knowing how dangerous it is to do so. And the believer who understands “Faith in Jesus doesn’t promise us that the damage sin has done in this world won’t affect us ever again – not here. But faith in Jesus means it doesn’t win.”  I love his depth.

There is also Barney, brief though his role is, I felt myself saying if only…. Churches need someone like him.

Questions, questions

“Will Not See” has left me with questions for which I need answers. Chautona Havig you have me dangling – this is so unfair!

Would I recommend this book?

Having read “None So Blind”, I am glad I have had the opportunity to read “Will Not See” and am looking forward to the sequel. I have come to care about these characters, and I want to know what happens to them. So yes I would definitely recommend this book and the previous one too. When is the next one coming out, I need it to tie-up all the loose ends?

*I received this book for free. No compensation was received, and all opinions are my own.*

Book review for Will Not See by Chautona Havig

 About the Book

Book title: Will Not SeeA traumatic event - Book review for Will Not See by Chautona Havig

Author: Chautona Havig

Release date: August 29, 2017

Genre: Christian Fiction / contemporary / suspense (light)

When Vikki Jeffries wakes up in a Rockland hotel with no idea of who she is and why she can’t remember… well, anything, the Rockland medical community begins to take a closer look at what may have happened to cause a second case of inexplicable amnesia.

But for Vikki, this is more than a medical anomaly–it’s her life. What is she doing in Rockland, thousands of miles away from her home in Apache Junction, Arizona? Who is she? Why is no one looking for her? Or are they?

Will Not See: Not everything is as it seems.


Book Link on Website

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About the Author

Author of the Amazon best-selling Aggie and Past Forward Series, media-headshotChautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert. With dozens of books to her name, Chautona spends most of her time writing, but when she takes the rare break, she can be found reading, sewing, paper crafting, or sleeping and dreaming of finishing the dozens of books swirling in her overly-active imagination at any given moment


Guest Post from Chautona Havig

The circle of death swirls on the screen and it shifts. The bank balance appears, and with it, my heart sinks. It’s been a tough few months, financially.  The bottom line proves it.

My reaction? Inhale. Exhale. “Okay, now we know the worst. We can do something about it.”

My husband, on the other hand, suffers a definite blow. Kevin might not sleep that night. Instead, he’ll mull over what we could have done differently, how we can make changes if he’s a failure at this thing called life.  He’ll pray—for hours.

They say ignorance is bliss. And sometimes, that’s true. It’s also a personality thing, I think. I tend to be a “let me have your worst” kind of gal. But when the negative arrives, I also tend to want to shield Kevin from it all. I don’t know how he can worry so much.  He can’t fathom how I can turn it off.

But sometimes those personality things go deeper—into what can be serious faults.  It has been said,

“There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know.” 

Or, in the words of Jeremiah,

“Now hear this, O foolish and senseless people, who have eyes but do not see, who have ears but do not hear.”

What does this have to do with not seeing?

As I work on the Sight Unseen series, one recurring theme happens, of course. Memory loss—the removal of all insight into one’s past.  You can hear who you were, be informed of what you did and why others think you did it, but you can’t know your own self the way you once did. It’s a fresh slate, and it can be a good thing in some respects.

Those around you can now see the difference between habits and personality traits—true dislikes and those conditioned by life. What might have been a fear once could be gone if the cause of that fear is blotted out.

But even for these fictional characters, truth doesn’t change. In None So Blind, Ella takes her memory loss and uses it as an opportunity to reinvent herself, if you will. And you know what?  If you asked her family about it, they’d tell you that it fits her personality.  That take-charge gotta get ’er done attitude Dani may have used in different ways, but both “manifestations” of the woman had those qualities.  Sure, Ella’s was tempered by recent experience, but not much.

Vikki Jeffries, is almost the antithesis of Ella in that respect. 

The past is in the past. It scares her. Is it because she doesn’t know it?  Because she’s frightened by the unknown? We don’t know. But what we do know is anything associated with that past, even the few very personal items she finds, she rejects. It’s as if ignorance of them will protect her from them. Where Ella runs to face her problems, Vikki runs from them.

But despite those differences, I find it interesting that both women did the same thing, basically—just at different times.

Before her “episode,” Ella chose to blind herself to her faults.  She knew them. Lived with them daily, but couldn’t face or address them. So, she “refused to see.”

Vikki—we don’t know. But I think the story shows that she couldn’t blind herself to truth before her episode.  As much as she might have ached to, she just couldn’t. Now that the opportunity is here, however, she grasps it and if she insists on squeezing her eyes shut indefinitely, it may cost her everything—her life.  Her soul.

Philippians 4:8, “…whatever is true.”

They say ignorance is bliss.  Well, “they” also say, “Truth hurts.”  And sometimes it does. But so do the consequences of that ignorance.  I guess the next time the bank balance dips low, I won’t be handling the fallout alone.  Then again, one can always pray that it doesn’t dip low!  I think we’ll start there.

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Chautona’s Giveaway

Will not see by Chautona Havig Giveaway

To celebrate her tour, Chautona is giving away a grand prize of the None So Blind Paperback, the Will Not See Paperback, a Journaling Bible (Choice of KJV or NLT), Prismacolor Pencils, and a Christian Hymns Album!! Click below to enter. Be sure to comment on this post before you enter to claim 9 extra entries!