Today’s guest on my island couch is Dan Chrystal author of The Lost Art of Relationship. It is such a pleasure to have you here Dan. I am looking forward to learning more about you while on my desert island.
Dan – Thank you for having me, Margaret.
Please give a warm welcome to Dan Chrystal everyone.
As you bask in the sun…
Who would you like to be marooned on the island with and why?
DAN CHRYSTAL- This one is easy. My wife! I chose to be married to her and be in relationship until “death do us part” and I am grateful for every moment I get with her! Plus, she is one of the most resourceful people I know – so survival would be a little easier. Since we already know each other and have committed to one another, we wouldn’t need to start from scratch in relationship. We have already progressed through what I call the eight levels of relationship and made it to the highest level – Someone you can call family.
Margaret – I love the way you talk about relationship, especially as it is challenged so much by today’s world. And how lovely that you would choose your wife. I can really feel your connection.
In relation to your most recent published book..
What is your favourite sentence?
DAN CHRYSTAL– “You could argue that failure is not punishment and… success is not reward. They’re just failure and success. You can choose how you respond.”
~ Sarah Lewis, The Rise: Creativity, The Gift of Failure, and the Search for Mastery.
Margaret – That is so true Dan, our response to many situations is our choice. The way we choose our response will determine our outlook. That can be applied to so many things, in all we have a choice. Success and failure do not have to be an end result but the beginning of choice. I hope I have interpreted that correctly?
You love writing..
But do you have another passion?
DAN CHRYSTAL – By far, my greatest passion is speaking and teaching. It is invigorating to share with people and see that “light” turn on inside their minds. I used to wonder if speaking and teaching was just a way to feel good from the accolades. However, several Sundays in a row I decided to walk off the platform and out the door to see how I felt and each time I was just as invigorated as before. One of my favorite reality TV shows is America’s Got Talent. When someone shares their talent with the world for the first time in this setting and are appreciated by the crowd – that moment when they realize their dream has come true is what I live for. Teaching others and helping them to realize their dreams is a moment I love to be a part of.
Margaret – Yes, it is definitely a joy to see the dreams become a reality despite the struggles many have to realize it. Even if it is for a moment, the applause, the recognition of talent can change someone’s life. That relationship between the dreamer and the dream coming true, a God-given moment, the spark, I have witnessed that too. It is awesome. To give someone that power to be.
Here on my island..
You are given one wish, but there is a clause which means you can only ask to be an animal. What creature would you like to be?
DAN CHRYSTAL– Oooooooh, I like this question. I would choose to be an eagle. An eagle perches high so they can see all around them. They can soar on the wind without much effort, can scan prey from the heights and are what is known as APEX predator – meaning they are at the top of the food chain. Also, eagles mate for life – so I’d like my wife to turn into one as well!
Margaret – I love eagles too, and especially the reference from Isaiah that talks about eagles. “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31. Great choice Dan.
My final question and it has to do with food!
What food would you miss the most being on a desert island?
DAN CHRYSTAL – I would most certainly miss fried chicken, baked chicken, bbq’d chicken, and pretty much any type of chicken. There is just something amazing about chicken – it is so versatile, goes with any side dish and don’t even get me started on rotisserie!
Margaret – So I take it you like chicken!!
On that note, I would like to thank Dan Chrystal for taking the time to share with us his thoughts while being on my couch.
Dan’s book is on sale here and if you would like to enter his GIVEAWAY then please find the entry details at the bottom of my blog.
About the Book
Title: The Lost Art of Relationship
Author: Dan Chrystal
Genre: Christian non-fiction, Christian living
Release date: October 15, 2018
Relationship is a journey of discovery—a lost art. In this generation, it has become challenging to deepen and grow personal relationships with each other. Our technology-flooded environment has left many with limited relational experience and a fear of face-to-face connection and meeting new people.
The church has done a decent job of helping people understand the need and importance of a relationship with God, but what about with each other? At the heart of every man, woman, and child is the need for connection—for relationships with people who love them for who they are.
In The Lost Art of Relationship, Dan Chrystal tackles the heart of relationship based on the time-honored instruction to “love your neighbor as you love yourself.” But what does that mean? How do we live out this odd instruction? Who is my neighbor, anyway? What makes relationships healthy, and what makes them fail? Through Dan’s personal stories and difficult life lessons, readers will come away encouraged, inspired, and motivated to love the people in their life more fully. If you desire deep and meaningful connections, now is the time to discover the lost art of relationship.
About the Author
“Choose a good reputation over great riches.” (Proverbs 22:1)
Guest post from Dan Chrystal
For two years, I experienced what many would call a “wilderness experience.” I truly felt forgotten. Having spent twenty years in various aspects of church work, meeting and coaching hundreds of people, I still felt like I didn’t truly understand why I was put on this earth. I have moved nine times in my adult life. Everywhere I’ve lived, I had to start over—at work, home, schools for kids, and especially in relationship with others.
The last move was different. This time I was no longer looking to connect simply for the sake of connecting. There was a purpose for connection that was brewing inside me. That purpose became the driving force of my life and remains that way today. In fact, it consumes my thought life, relationships, ministry, and every aspect of what I do, think, and say.
Connecting with others has been a part of my life wherever I have gone. This came from watching my mom over many years meet, talk to, and befriend hundreds of people. At her funeral, I had just about that many tell me “thank you” for allowing my mom to be a part of their lives—how she encouraged them and truly got to know them for who they are.
During my two-year “wilderness” period, there was a realization that over all the moves, restarts, connections, coffee appointments, coaching, lunches, and dinners with people, I was learning the essence of what I believe we are called, or actually commanded, to do by Jesus. Such a simple sentence, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” However, it is one of the most difficult things to live out every day. Let’s face it; relationships are messy. They can be downright frustrating at times, but they are a necessary part of life, and the second most important thing to God.
Continually learning the art
I am by no means an “expert” in relationship and I am and always will be a student of it. Consequently, I have watched relationships thrive, survive, and some fall away. There are so many divisions that come between us, and during those two years of struggling with my purpose, it became clear—God has designed, purposed, and prepared me to help others discover what it means to love your neighbor as yourself. I am not perfect at this. As a matter of fact, I struggle—sometimes daily. That is what sparked the writing of this book. I have found there is an art to relationship. For most, it is a lost art, one that can be rediscovered. I would love it if you would join me in discovering The Lost Art of Relationship.
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